How to Witch in 4 Easy Steps

After years of hearing Grandpa Archer make passing references to "witching" for underground water, I finally insisted that he give Katie, Mom, Dad and I a demonstration. Witching (or "dowsing") for water is an ancient technique, and is apparently how my relatives decided where to dig their wells in western Oklahoma. While there are various ways to witch (dowsing rods, pendulums, etc.), Grandpa prefers to use a green twig, much like the 18th century French fellow in the picture at right. How does one witch for water? Here are Grandpa's steps:

1. Cut a "Y" shaped green twig. Grandpa recommends a peach twig, though he suggests willow as a possible alternative.

2. Remove leaves, knots, etc., with a knife.

3. Firmly grasp each arm of the "Y" in each hand, holding the twig palms-up. Hold the twig away from the body, straightening the arms until they are at a 45 degree angle.

4. Begin pacing forward slowly. When you come to water, you should feel the twig begin to twist itself downward, toward the ground.

For the record, when I tried I was able to get the twig to twist in my hand. Mom, Dad, and Katie were not met with much success. I've heard that dowsers can make a lot of money. Have I stumbled upon my life calling?